I know you.
I guess I should say I knew you.
It seems like a lifetime ago. Poor guy. I’m so sorry. You look so scared and so blank. So utterly confused. And you’re freezing. I remember that much. Here-have another blanket. I know, right out of the warmer? The best!
That catheter is going to hurt like hell when he pulls it out. But he’s not going to hurt you. I know you’ve been hurt before, but try and be kind. He’s just doing his job.
What? Oh, the necklace. It’s called a “giving key”. Gigi gave it to me about six months after this whole nightmare. It says Grace. A word you know nothing about, my friend. Not yet.
You still think grace is part of an old melody you hum as you cut grass. But grace is stronger than any other force in your life. Grace is why you’re still here. And grace will lead you home.
The headache? The throat that feels like razor blades? The legs that will be numb for two more days? The staring out the window, blankly? All of that is grace. It’s called a second chance.
I know you don’t want to be here. But one day, you’ll thank God you made it. You have a long road ahead of you. Counseling, intense therapy, new meds, and lots and lots of embarrassing honesty. But you will make it. You’ll find a strength you didn’t have: the strength to admit you are weak. It will make you a new person.
No, Mom and Dad aren’t going to show up. Yes, that sucks worse than just about anything else that has led you to this point. Four years later, I still can’t wrap my mind around that one, but the best I can tell you is that fear makes people do some really dumb and hurtful things. Even when they love you.
Why’s your throat so sore? You should have seen the hotel room. All of the medications you took, combined with the benadryl, turned the vomit blood red. The room looked just like a murder scene and they thought you were dead. But you’ll sing again one day. Trust me. Here’s your water. Don’t try to talk. It just makes it worse. But it will heal. And so will you. You’ll learn what living is really like.
In the meantime, I need to tell you a few things:
Grace has found you. And it will not leave you in this bed.
Steve Austin is an author, speaker, and life coach who is passionate about helping overwhelmed people learn to catch their breath. He is the author of two Amazon bestsellers, "Catching Your Breath," and "From Pastor to a Psych Ward." Steve lives with his wife and two children in Birmingham, Alabama.
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